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Friday, August 22, 2008

"The Wright Stuff" ~ Is Teasing Torture?

Are parents who tease their own children: for having funny ears, or red hair or bit too much weight or for being a bit dim, well, are they inadvertently damaging them, filling them with complexes and insecurities. Is teasing torture or are children who grow up feeling damaged by mum and dad's hiliarious put-downs too damn sensitive? (This Weeks panel: Anne Diamond & Ed Vaizey with special guest: Dame Tanni Grey-Thompson). Please watch both videos and tell me what do you think?

These videos are from the I believe British show The Wright Stuff. The first video is a sort of introduction with the panel and the second are viewer calls.


Katie's Blog said...

My dad used to call my sister bird legs becaus she was super skinny. He called my mother eagle beak. I think teasing from parents can be worse than teasing from others because your parents are supposed to be there for you, support you and be the ones who protect you from that kind of thing. They're supposed to be on your side, you know?

I had funny feet as a kid. A friend of mine called me a "crooked footed fool" and it affected me so bad. I ran home and told my mother and she did nothing...she didn't say anything to the kid (who was right outside) and never told me different. I grew up with a complex about my feet, though.

Patches said...

I am unable to watch the videos as this is a triggering sensitive issue for us.

We believe that there is no one answer to this, that it depends on the child and the nature of the teasing. Putting down a child because of something they may be sensitive about (hair color, weight) is wrong in my opinion. I don't see anything wrong with a good natured joke, but some things go to far. For instance the mother one april fools day told us our dog had died and let us believe it all day long (this was a few years after we had lost a dog) That was just cruel of her, as was the way she laughed and laughed at us after she told us it was a joke.

Anonymous said...

It just depends on the nature of the teasing... name calling isn't funny but nicknames are endearing and show love not torture. The line can be thin but there is a line.

In a foster home I use to live in a little boy got teased at school for wearing glasses. At home the foster parents teased him too. The foster mother told him he was being sensitive and he should be use to it because the kids at school do it. This little boy of about 8 years old said to the foster mother, "But at home I shouldn't have to go through this." Dinner was rather quiet after that.

My point is this, when the child is already being teased for a certain thing how helpful can it be to have a parent tease them too? There has to be a shield from the world who doesn't always think before they speak.

Also, if a child is being abused or has been abused they'll take teasing harder than if they come from a functionally dysfunctional family. My teasing at home hurt worse because it was insult to injury.


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