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A key word that you will see:

Fragmentation: a mental process where a person becomes intensely emotionally focused on one aspect of themselves, such as “I am angry” or “no one loves me,” to the point where all thoughts, feelings and behavior demonstrate this emotional state, in which, the person does not or is unable to take into account the reality of their environment, others or themselves and their resources. This is a term that my therapist and I use and is on the continuum of dissociation.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Tell Me That "It Gets Better"

I've been wondering why the "It Gets Better" project and the two song on my side bar have resonated with me so much.  I really seem to identify with them. My ENTIRE life I've had some type of suicidal thoughts and have struggled with bullying, harassment, threats even on my life and hopelessness.  I keep thinking that I wish that someone would have told me that "it gets better" although I'm not sure I would have believed them.

Currently, in therapy, I've been having my ups and downs with feeling hopeless which is actually a defense against just being myself. The first song, by the Gay Men's Chorus of Los Angeles is about showing your "true colors" or just being yourself to others.  This is so difficult to do as I've learned to really hide myself from others and myself. The second song, by Broadway singers, is an upbeat song about it getting better.  I am grateful as I know that hopeful place now. I'm not sure if I would have believed it growing up.

However, I am thankful that God put others in my life to give me hope at times and in there own way told me that it gets better.  Currently, I feel like He has given me some fabulous support and for that I am thankful.  As you listen to the songs, don't think of them as GLBT song, but as songs for yourself.  Songs of love and hope!!  (I promise no more video posts of these songs!)

Show your "True Colors" and remember that it really does "Get Better"


You with the sad eyes
Don't be discouraged
Oh I realize
It's hard to take courage
In a world full of people
You can lose sight of it all
And the darkness inside you
Can make you feel so small


But I see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that's why I love you
So don't be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful,
Like a rainbow


Show me a smile then,
Don't be unhappy, can't remember
When I last saw you laughing
If this world makes you crazy
And you've taken all you can bear
You call me up
Because you know I'll be there


And I'll see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that's why I love you
So don't be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful,
Like a rainbow




Hey friend,
When you feel like you're alone
And the world throws out a lot of hate

It's not the end
You're not out there on your own
There's still so much in life to celebrate

Just look up
Cause those skies are going to clear
There so much more than just the hear and now

Just look up
Cause a better day is here
Tomorrow feel the sunlight shining down

It gets better, better, better
The pain will let up, let up, let up
If you fall just get up, get up, get up

Ohh, cause there's another way
It gets better, better, better
The world gets lighter, lighter, lighter
So be a fighter, fighter, fighter

Ohh, just live to see that day
Yeah, live to see that day (that day)
Live to see that day

Hey friend,
We used to feel like you
No end in sight

Fearing everyday
Just defend the part of you that's true
Find yourself and you will find the way

Don't give up (Don't give up)
Just take another look
And you can shine
It's time you took the stage

Don't give up
Cause your life is like a book
All you got to do is turn the page

There are friends yet to meet,
There are songs to be sung
There are beautiful sunsets
And battles are won
There's love to be found if you just stick around
Don't give up your life has just begun

It gets better, better, better
The pain will let up, let up, let up
If you fall just get up, get up, get up

Ohh, cause there's another way
It gets better, better, better
The world gets lighter, lighter, lighter
So be a fighter, fighter, fighter

Ohh, just live to see that day
It gets better, better, better
The pain will let up, let up, let up
If you fall just get up, get up, get up

Ohh, cause there's another way
It gets better, better, better
The world gets lighter, lighter, lighter
So be a fighter, fighter, fighter

Ohh, just live to see that day
It gets better, better, better
The world gets lighter, lighter, lighter
So be a fighter, fighter, fighter

Ohh, just live to see that day
It gets better, better, better
It gets better, better, better
It gets better, better, better
It gets better, better, better

2 comments:

Wanda's Wings said...

We have to hang on to the hope that it does get better. I seem so many horrific things in my life, the latest was my child dying as I stroked his arms and prayed to God to spare his live. Only in his twenties I really believed God would not take him home. Believing in things getting better can be hard, but sometime it all you got. You are a jewel worth much. Just keeping holding on through your depression. Things will get better.

Clueless said...

Yes, hope is the key. You have had quite a lot of turmoil and pain this year...((((((Wanda))))))

Thank you for your encouraging words...it will get better for both of use, but not without pain.

Blessings,
CC

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