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A key word that you will see:

Fragmentation: a mental process where a person becomes intensely emotionally focused on one aspect of themselves, such as “I am angry” or “no one loves me,” to the point where all thoughts, feelings and behavior demonstrate this emotional state, in which, the person does not or is unable to take into account the reality of their environment, others or themselves and their resources. This is a term that my therapist and I use and is on the continuum of dissociation.

Friday, January 16, 2009

A hymn, fingerpainting, blogging, journaling, plans & laughter!!

Well, this is a MEME, that I couldn't pass up when I saw it on Change Therapy by Isabella Mori. It’s really simple – if you want to be interviewed by someone who’s participating, just let them know, and they’ll send you five questions. that’s what Isabella did and she was gave me some great questions. That really made me think. So here they are...

1. What’s your favourite hymn, and why?

I am not much into hymn's. I like contemporary Christian music better. But, if I have to pick a hymn it would be Amazing Grace I love the history and words of this hymn. My favorite contemporary Christian song would have to be Mourning into Dancing.

This song came out in the 1990's which was during my first 12 years of therapy. Even though it was such a joyous song all I could do was cry because it was just so painful to me.

After struggling in my healing via the church ministries and psychotherapy, one day this song began and I braced myself for painful tears, but instead of painful tears I cried tears of joy. What I felt like God had put into my heart was that He had already done that in some areas (turned my mourning into dancing) even if I didn't feel it and it was His promise to me that I would feel the joy the song speaks about. It is a reminder that I will one day sing this song again at my church with thankfulness. It gave me hope. (Sung by the Christian Gospel Temple from where I don't know I couldn't find any other credits.)

This song was inspired by "You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever." (Psalm 30:11-12, NLT)
Sorry for the long answer.

2. What do you like about finger painting?
Finger painting allows me to express what I cannot express verbally or in writing. It touches a very young place inside or a very primative place inside that I am not usually aware of, but is effecting me. Instead of self-injury, I can express myself in this manner. It has been extremely therapeutic for me and was a major turning point when I discovered it during one of my hospitalizations.

3. What’s the best thing you’re planning on making happen this year?

Making more progress in therapy and beginning to start doing some normal things again like baking, reading, cooking, etc... This is as I am able to do so. My therapist is having to structure this as I tend to take on too much and get overwhelmed or I choose something that isn't what I want, it is what I think I should do. He wants me to do something fun and realistic.

4. How can journaling and blogging help with mental health?

For me, I love to write and generally do so uncensored (as much as possible). Journaling is my tool for this and I tend to process as I write, so therapeutically it is helpful and allows me to share in therapy things that are really difficult. It is also another substitute for self-injury. Sometimes, it is helpful to just write it down so that I can say to myself, "I can put this aside until my next session."

Blogging has opened up a whole new experience for me in which I've been extremely surprised. It is a place where I can tell the truth and receive "group" support and feedback and support others. I can interact with many different types of people and am learning how to deal with situation in which I react. I have met so many wonderful people and it has opened up opportunities that I would have never dreamed. It has also helped my therapy progress significantly.

5. What makes you laugh?

I like witty, sarcastic humor. Also, humor that takes a look at everyday things in life and twists it ever so slightly like the Far Side. Snoopy almost always makes me smile or laugh as do dogs especially black labradors. My husband, my friend S, my therapist and musical comedies make me laugh.

Want to get in on the fun? you can be a part of it by following a few simple steps…

Leave a comment here on this post and ask me to interview you

I’ll respond within 10 days with 5 questions personalized to you

Answer the questions on your blog and link back to this post Oh and let me know when you post because I want to see the answers.

Invite others to participate by re-posting these steps

Once you’ve posted your interview, i’ll post a link to it here by creating a new post with everyone's questions.

Due to the place I am at, I am only going to accept the first five people who request to be interviewed, so leave me a comment.

7 comments:

eeabee said...

Hi CC--

I'd like to participate in this. Thanks for doing it!

eeabee

Immi said...

Fun to learn more about you, CC!
Sounds fun. I'll go for it if I'm in line. If not, that's ok too. I wouldn't want to do an endless line of them either. Talk about exhausting! I guess I'm more curious what questions anyone would ask me than anything. Maybe I should look at my own blog and I could figure that out? Oh no, bring my own brain? No way ;)
I hope the "really rottens" are starting to pass for you CC. *sending hugs your way*

Melinda said...

CC, I hope that during the next year, you *will* find pleasure in being able to bake, read, etc--that is truly my wish for you.

I'm also glad that you have been able to journal and blog. I was just writing this to Dr. Jay today--but I think that my journaling during my early recovery was absolutely crucial to the process. Of course, there were no blogs in the mid-90's but I filled up several journals trying to sort out my confused and emotional feelings. And today, those journals have been immensely important in writing my memoir.

I liked taking a more in depth peek into you in this post--thank you for that.

Take care (and hugs)

Melinda

Clueless said...

I'll do this for you when I return from the hosptial. There are some slots open if you want to do this.

isabella mori said...

thank you, CC! it's really fascinating to get to know you better this way. i'm going to try again to listen to the song; just now i couldn't load it.

looks like we have similar taste in humour. i love the far side!

Anonymous said...

I know you only said the first five; am praying that you are at a somewhat better place and can squeeze me in.
Please visit my blog to see what I'm about...I've censored my remarks much more than you have...I'm not as anonymous, and am less courageous, but nevertheless, maybe you can read between the lines.

Clueless said...

Kneeling Warrior,

Thank you for visiting my site and of course, I'll try to come up with five meaningful questions. Just give me some time to get adjusted from the hospital.

CC

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